What this episode is about
Gabriella joins Dr. Tina Sogocio for conversation about what it actually takes to keep love alive through one of the most destabilizing transitions a woman can go through.
Key takeaways
- Gabriella says many changes after menopause are normal, and it's important to understand that you are not broken.
- Gabriella says menopause is a beautiful invitation to get to know yourself better. We can blame it for a lot of things, but she calls it a gift.
- Gabriella says women want to feel seen, and that is the foreplay. We want to feel emotionally safe before we can fully open up.
Moments from this episode
Word for word from the recording. Tap a time to hear it.
Menopause pulls the band-aid off
“Especially in midlife as we enter this stage, how drastically things can change and how our identities get thrown into this mix, and it almost feels like menopause pulls the band-aid off and makes us very vulnerable.”
Dr. Tina SogoccioGuest
7:07Stop keeping the peace
“Maybe you made dinner chicken nuggets and fries because that's what the family wanted, but that's the last thing you ever wanted, right? Or you prioritize pleasing your partner to keep the peace. But you don't have to do that anymore.”
Emotionally safe first
“We want to feel emotionally safe before we can fully open it up. We need to get out of our heads and into our bodies. And honestly, nothing does that like just being together with no pressure attached.”
Start from comfort
“I always say to my patients, it's always easier to work from a place of comfort than from a place of discomfort.”
Dr. Tina SogoccioGuest
39:55“Really getting to know yourself better, and menopause is a beautiful invitation for that. We can blame menopause for a lot of things, but wow, what a gift to be able to get to know ourselves better.”
Gabriella Espinosaat 17:40
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Show notes
Two women. Both champions in the midlife women's health space. Both celebrating their 25th wedding anniversaries in the same summer. And both deeply committed to changing the conversation around intimacy, pleasure, and connection in midlife.
In this episode Gabriella sits in the interviewee seat again, joining Dr. Tina Sogocio, physician and menopause educator, for an Instagram Live conversation about what it actually takes to keep love alive through one of the most destabilizing transitions a woman can go through. This is a conversation between two midlife women comparing notes , on long marriages, on the changes menopause brings to intimacy and identity, on what couples who come out stronger actually do differently, and on why this generation of women has an opportunity their mothers never did.
Read the full show notesShow less
Warm, honest, and full of practical wisdom from both sides of the exam room, this episode will leave you feeling seen, informed, and a little more hopeful about what is possible in love and intimacy in this season of life.
Are you ready to awaken your sensuality and feel more empowered in your body? Access the FREE Pleasure Upgrade Bundle at pleasureinthepause.com/gift.
Dr. Tina Sogocio is a physician, menopause educator, and advocate focused on helping women better understand and navigate the hormonal transitions of midlife. Through both her clinical care and public education work, she supports women during perimenopause, menopause, and the years that follow. In addition to caring for patients, Dr. Sogocio speaks and leads community conversations that bring clear, compassionate insight to women’s health and midlife well-being.
Highlights from our discussion include:
- Why menopause pulls the Band-Aid off and makes couples vulnerable in ways they were not prepared for
- How couples who come out stronger approach change with curiosity rather than going quiet
- Why feeling seen and heard by a partner is the foundation of intimacy and the best foreplay there is
- The difference between therapy and coaching and why both play a vital role in midlife healing
- How the nervous system river metaphor explains why so many women cannot find their way back to pleasure, joy, and connection
- Why doctors have to do better at asking directly about intimate health and what women can do when they do not
- Why this generation of women is redefining what love, intimacy, and pleasure look like in the second half of life
Dr. Tina said something near the end of our conversation that I keep coming back to. It is not a one and done. We are constantly evolving. And the post-menopausal years are not a winding down. They are an invitation to live into. Our generation of women has an opportunity our mothers never had , to redefine who we are becoming and how we want to live, love, and feel in this season of life. That is not a small thing. That is everything.
If this episode resonated, subscribe to Pleasure in the Pause and share it with a woman or a couple in your life who needs this conversation. And if you want to go deeper into this work, you will find all of Gabriella's coaching resources at pleasureinthepause.com.
If you're seeking to reclaim your pleasure and vitality, join Gabriella at pleasureinthepause.com for this enlightening journey into the heart of female pleasure and empowerment.
CONNECT WITH DR. TINA SOGOCIO:
CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA:
Episode 114 , Intimate Wellness with Sally Mueller and Womaness
Episode 110 , How Co-Regulation Deepens Intimacy
The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.
