Writing Identity

Feeling Disconnected From Your Body in Perimenopause

The distance you feel from your own body in perimenopause is real, it has a name, and it is not a sign that something is wrong with you.

Gabriella Espinosa 7 min read

The quick answer

Feeling disconnected from your body in perimenopause is common and it is not imagined. Hormonal change affects mood, memory, sleep and sensation, so the body that once felt familiar can start to feel unfamiliar. Clinicians have a name for it. It is a recognized part of the transition, not a personal failing, and the connection can be rebuilt.

Who’s answering

Gabriella, with Dr. Shahzadi Harper and 4 more

Where it comes from

9 episodes of Pleasure in the Pause

Time to read

7 minutes, 5 questions answered

That is the medical answer. Here is the human one.

There is a moment that sneaks up on a lot of us. You pause in the middle of an ordinary day and realize you feel far away from yourself. The energy you used to have is out of reach. Things that used to land just do not land. Nobody warned you this part was coming, so you assume it is you.

It is not you. What you are describing is disconnection, and it is the most honest word for what happens in this transition. It shows up quietly. Overriding what your body is telling you. Going through the motions. Living in your head. Not knowing what you want anymore. Not feeling like yourself.

What does it mean to feel disconnected from your body?

It means the signal has gone quiet. Your body is still sending information, and the line between the sending and the receiving has gone thin.

Women describe it in almost the same words, over and over. Like watching yourself from a distance. Like wearing someone else's skin.

“It felt like an impostor, just an alien had taken hold of my body, and like, who is that? And why can't I do the things that I used to do?”

Kat Farrantsfounder of Movement for Modern LifeEpisode 30, at 6:48 Hear this moment

That description came out of a panel conversation about the medical side of this transition, and it is the line women repeat back. The feeling is specific enough to have been studied, and researchers have a name for it.

Why does this happen in perimenopause?

Because the change is not confined to one part of you. Hormone receptors are spread throughout the body, so shifting hormone levels reach mood, sleep, joints, memory and sensation at the same time. That is why the experience feels total rather than local, and why it is so often mistaken for a personality problem.

It is also why the explanation is never only hormonal.

“I often say libido is multifactorial. It's not just about chemicals and physical, but it can be, there can be things within a relationship that are unresolved, that need to be communicated.”

Dr. Shahzadi Harperperimenopause and menopause physicianEpisode 4, at 22:40 Hear this moment

Hold both of those at once and the picture gets clearer. The biology is real. So is everything else you are carrying. A woman who is told it is all hormones gets no help with the rest of her life, and a woman who is told it is all stress gets no help with her biology.

Is something wrong with me?

No. And this is the part worth slowing down for, because most women arrive at this question having already answered it privately, in the least generous way available.

“Just because you're having hormone problems doesn't mean you're broken. It means that we're living in a world that creates fractures in how we communicate this biological messaging.”

Dr. Aviva RommYale-trained MD, midwife and herbalistEpisode 45, at 24:32 Hear this moment

Your body is not malfunctioning. It is doing something it was always going to do, in a culture that gave you almost no preparation for it and very little language to describe it once it started. The distance you feel is information about a transition, not evidence of a defect.

Which leads to the reframe that changes how this feels to live inside:

“Menopause isn't something that happens to us. It's a transformative journey we get to meet with open eyes, informed hearts, and the radical belief that our bodies are not broken, they are brilliant.”

Gabriella EspinosahostEpisode 45, at 2:24 Hear this moment

Can you reconnect with your body after feeling this way?

Yes, and it starts smaller than most women expect. Not a program. A practice of noticing.

The capacity involved has a name. Interoception is your ability to sense what is happening inside you, the signal that tells you that you are hungry, tired, tense or moved. It is trainable. Most of us spent years training it in the opposite direction, pushing through exhaustion and overriding what we felt, and that is exactly why it went quiet.

A way to begin, and it takes a minute:

  • Put your hands somewhere that feels like your center. Heart, belly, or lower.
  • Notice the temperature where your hands meet your body.
  • Feel your breath without trying to change it.
  • Notice one sensation, and give it a name.
  • Let whatever you find be there without deciding whether it is good.

Notice, feel, name. That is the whole practice, and the naming matters as much as the noticing. Being able to say I need to slow down, or I want more of that, is not confidence. It is vocabulary. Most of us were never taught it, and the silence costs us in the bedroom, in the doctor's office, and in our own company.

Do it in ordinary moments, not just difficult ones. The muscle is built on small reps.

What if I do not feel anything at all?

Then that is your starting point, and it counts.

Numbness gets read as absence, as nothing happening. It is not nothing. Even numbness is information. If desire has gone flat, that is information. If a day you should have enjoyed slid past untasted, that is information. Your body is communicating the whole time, including when the message is that something has gone quiet and needs tending.

“It is not extra. It is not when your kids get older. Your joy is what makes you exist. It is who you are.”

Marcella Hillauthor and founder of Wake Her UpEpisode 24, at 57:27 Hear this moment

Reconnection is not a performance of feeling better. It is the slow return of sensation, and it usually arrives in unremarkable moments first.

If something in you is whispering, I miss that part of myself, listen. You are allowed to want it back.

Common questions

Is feeling disconnected from your body a normal part of perimenopause?

Yes. It is widely reported and it is recognized by clinicians who work in this area. It is a feature of the transition rather than a sign that something has gone wrong with you.

How long does it last?

It varies, and it is not a fixed sentence. The distance tends to narrow as the transition settles and as the practice of noticing is rebuilt. Support, medical and otherwise, changes the picture for many women.

Is this the same as depression?

No, though the two can look alike from the outside and can occur together. If low mood is persistent, or you are struggling to function, speak to a doctor. Gabriella is a coach and an educator, not a therapist or a physician.

What is the smallest thing I can do today?

Pause once and name one sensation in your body. That is the beginning of it.

How this article was made

Every quote is word for word from the episode transcript, with the time it was said.
9 episodes5 quotes checked
Episodes9
Quotes, word for word5
Experts quoted5

The episodes it draws on

Every quote, and where to hear it

How each quote was checked

We matched every quote against the transcript of the episode it comes from, and against who was speaking. Punctuation and capital letters were added so it reads well on the page. No word was changed, added or dropped. The time is when the line starts, give or take a few seconds.

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