What this episode is about
Lizzie Bermudez shares an honest conversation about walking through over three years of her daughter's mental health struggles while putting her own life completely on hold.
Key takeaways
- Lizzie Bermudez says she was in family therapy for her daughter but needed her own. She tried three therapists over six to nine months before the last one stuck.
- Lizzie Bermudez says the DBT her family learned taught her that two things can be true at once, and there's room for both.
- Lizzie Bermudez says to help a friend in crisis, make yourself available even when it isn't convenient. That's when they truly need you.
Moments from this episode
Word for word from the recording. Tap a time to hear it.
Carrying a 100 pound vest
“It felt like I was moving through life just like this 100 pound vest, you know, sometimes almost suffocating me.”
Show up when it's inconvenient
“It's really making yourself available when things aren't convenient, because that's when somebody really truly needs you.”
A place that was all my own
“I need a place if I want to eat in bed that I can eat in bed, you know, if I want to crawl into bed and cry. Nobody, like, I just needed a place that was all my own.”
Waking up with lightness again
“To open my eyes in the morning and it's like, tada, you get another day, and oh my god, it's sunny, and it's given me this beautiful clarity and lightness.”
“I like the idea of offering space in your home or just come over. I don't even have to talk to you. Just right, come over and have a sit by the fire or just sit on the patio.”
Gabriella Espinosaat 44:18
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Show notes
Have you ever gone through a season of life where everything else had to be put on hold because someone you love needed all of you?
In this debut episode of Return to Her, a new monthly series on Pleasure in the Pause, I’m joined by lifestyle host and midlife influencer Lizzie Bermudez for an honest conversation about a period of time when her daughter’s mental health challenges became her whole world… and what it took for Lizzie to slowly find her way back to herself.
Read the full show notesShow less
And because it’s February , the month of love and friendship , it felt like the right time to launch this series. Because Return to Her is a kind of love letter.
Not the romantic kind, but the kind we write (and sometimes rewrite) to ourselves. Especially in the seasons when we’re stretched thin, giving everything we have, and wondering if there’s anything left.
This series is about those moments. The real ones. Not the Instagram-perfect versions of life, but the behind-the-scenes, unfiltered parts we don’t often talk about.
It’s about what it looks like to return to yourself after caregiving… after crisis… after putting your life on pause to show up for someone else. And how, sometimes, loving ourselves back to life is the most powerful act of love we can offer.
In this episode, Lizzie shares what it felt like to be her daughter’s primary caretaker in survival mode… how she navigated the isolation and stigma of mental health… and the moment she realized that taking care of herself wasn’t selfish, it was necessary.
This is a story about motherhood, identity, and the slow, tender work of reclaiming yourself. And about how pleasure, even in small, quiet ways, can help lead us home.
Lizzie is a lifestyle host, podcaster and midlife influencer. She helps women embrace the "middle ages" by sharing tips, tricks, and interviews about looking and feeling your best when it comes to midlife, menopause and empty nesting. Lizzie B's audience knows she doesn't take herself too seriously, and viewers love following her entertaining behind-the-scenes stories on Instagram and TikTok. Lizzie also spent 20-plus years as an Emmy award-winning broadcast journalist and host. During that time, she interviewed everyone from celebrities to CEOs to presidents and developed the skills of storytelling and engaging viewers. If you ask Lizzie her favorite thing about switching from traditional media to digital, she’ll proudly tell you she can say just about whatever the eff she wants and no longer needs a full face of makeup to go on camera.
Highlights from our discussion include:
- When your child struggles with mental health, the isolation is overwhelming. People don't know what to say, so they say nothing.
- DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) gave her family tools and a shared language to navigate emotional regulation and crisis.
- Learning that two things can be true at once expanded her capacity to hold conflicting emotions without judgment.
- Coming home to herself feels like lightness. Waking up smiling again, cortisol releasing, opening to friendships after years of isolation.
- Laughter was medicine. Even in the darkest days, finding one thing to laugh about each day became a survival tool.
If you're in the thick of caregiving and losing yourself, if you're slowly coming back, or if you're still figuring it out, this conversation reminds you that returning to yourself is always possible. Listen now and discover that even after the most intense seasons, lightness and joy can return.
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The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.
About the guest
Lizzie BermudezLifestyle host, podcaster and midlife influencerGuest on this episode of Pleasure in the Pause.More about them
